As women, we all love receiving compliments. You’re a liar if you say you don’t. I think it’s because in a way it validates us even if we don’t need validation (remember: you don’t need anyone’s validation). It also lets you know that you did a good job in whatever it is you’re being complimented on. So the question remains, if we all love receiving compliments, why don’t we always give them as well?
There’s this concept that exists that I’ve been noticing more and more and I have yet to comprehend it. Why is it that women (in general) can’t give another woman a compliment? Is it because they’re jealous? Insecure? Because they don’t want the person to become even more conceited? Or because they don’t want the person to think too highly of themself? Personally, if I like what you’re wearing, using, doing or did, I have no problem in complimenting you.
I recently noticed this at work which is why I brought it up as a topic for a blog post. I had 2 male coworkers compliment me on something (more about this on a later post) and the female coworkers had yet to say anything. When the male coworkers complimented me a second time and this time in front of the female coworkers, that’s when they reacted and kind of agreed with them but sounded like it was more of just an agreement to not look bad. Why? By nature women are more observant of things, so why not compliment?
I asked this same question on my Facebook and several of my women friends commented that they believed it was jealousy and insecurity, and I agree. Giving someone a compliment when you really mean it doesn’t make you less than them, nor does it mean it’s going to make the person conceited. So if you notice something and it’s sincere, compliment them on whatever it is, whether it’s a new hair color, hair do, an accomplishment, weight loss or weight gain (some women struggle with this as well).
I find that there is so much competition between women and I fail to understand why. We’re all women so we should be helping each other out. Why not compliment another woman? Why not help her out if it’s within your reach to do so? Only then, will we all move forward and become better people. There is no competition; you create it yourself. There’s no reason we can’t all move forward in the life direction we want without another woman trying to put her foot in front of you. If something good happens to another woman, be happy for her and congratulate her on that.
Now, I realize that there are women out there that will want to compete with you. Believe me, I’ve had my share, but I’ve learned that the more they try to compete with you, the more they screw themselves up and end up showing their true colors.
Also, if you’re on the other end receiving a compliment, say thank you. No one is obligated to like or compliment you so be thankful that the person took the time to do so. You’re not that important. Plus, it also comes off as rude and arrogant as if you feel you deserve it. Yes, you might look beautiful in that outfit/picture but your lack of manners just proved how ugly you really are. That might be the reason why people aren’t complimenting you in the first place. No one likes a show off.
I end with this. Dont’ be hypocritical either. If you don’t like it or feel it, just don’t say anything. No need for negativity either.
Now, go out there and be nice to your fellow mujeres! Remember, whatever you do will always come back to you.
*All pictures obtained from Pinterest*